Recap of John Eldredge appearance in Minneapolis/St. Paul

Last week I attended the John Eldredge talk at Church of the Open Door. Here's a recap of his talk, which essentially was an outline of the six stages of a man's life:

Boyhood (birth to age 12)

* Meant to be a time of exploration and discovery

* Made safe by your father's strength

* It's wonderful to have a father show you how life works

* Boys need to know that their father adores them

* Often the wounding first happens in boyhood

Cowboy (ages 13 to 19)

* Ruled by the question "Do I have what it takes?"

* Validation needs to be established, which comes from someone speaking to you and also from experience

* Can be thwarted by: no one showing him how to do it, or boy trips and fails and no one helps him

* God wants us to live by faith and trust Him so we take risks

Warrior (starts around age 18, 19 or 20)

* Young men like competition

* God gives every man a warrior heart because: Adam had passivity, and we need to overcome it, and we live in a world at war with the kingdom of darkness

* Can be wounded by: being told as a boy that all aggression is wrong, or when a boy tries to rise up and fails

Lover (begins in late teens or early 20s)

* Runs essentially parallel to the Warrior stage

* Often takes a woman to awaken the heart

* Most men hide in the mind, but the heart is where the action is

* Friendship with God develops at this time

* Better if a little bit of the Warrior stage comes first

* Can get wounded by: boy being creative, Dad mocking it and humiliating boy; rejection; heartbreak

King (starts in late 30s or around 40)

* Man has a kingdom in which he has influence in the world

* We rule with God

* Question: when can we trust a man with power? There are many bad kings; a man can be trusted with power after he has been initiated

* Most of a midlife crisis is an unitiated man; God wants to come through and fill in the gaps

Sage (starts around late 50s or early 60s)

* A time of fathering others

* The sage is wounded when he is dismissed

* Becoming a mentor to warriors and kings

* Sages typically have to be asked; they won't voluntarily give advice in general

Incidentally, Eldredge was quite an interesting speaker in person. It was an excellent talk.