College and parents

Autumn brings with it the end of a season. For some parents, that involves dropping their child off at college.

Author John Eldredge recently shared in a letter what it has been like to drop his boys off at college:

Luke, our youngest, is heading off to college. Stasi (John's wife) would tell you that dropping Sam and Blaine off for their freshman years, and driving away, were two of the hardest things we have ever done. This year Stasi and I will drop Luke off and return this time to an empty house, where laughter and rowdiness and wrestling matches and family dinners have prevailed for many years. A beautiful season is drawing to a close.

Knowing this, in his immense kindness, Jesus gave our family a really sweet gift in July. You might recall from reading our books that the Tetons in Wyoming have been a special place for us over the years. We started camping there annually 15 summers ago, when Luke was four. It is a place filled with memory and tradition. I didn't think we could get there this year, but during a morning prayer walk in June Jesus said, Go to the Tetons. So we did, and it was very sweet.

Fifteen years ago we picnicked at a place along Cottonwood Creek. The boys - then 4, 6 and 8 - ate peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and played in the stream. For some reason we've never been back to that spot in all our years of adventuring there. Not till two weeks ago, when we found ourselves picnicking along the same creek. Our sons, now young men - 19, 21 and 23 - were laughing, telling stories of their adventures, talking about girls and marriage (!) and it was as poignant and transcendent as a moment can get. Time stood still. Stasi and I looked at each other and smiled. Remember?

As our trip drew to a close, Sam headed back to his life in California and Blaine left early for a class he needed. We could feel the chill of the coming fall when our family will no longer be the same. As you can imagine, I was pretty tender and very ready for tears; feelings of sorrow and loss were beginning to break my heart. It felt quite natural, and appropriate. Then came a great surprise.

I paused and asked Jesus, How do you want me to be looking at this Lord? He replied, This is a good season in your life John; you are not losing your family at all; your family is growing, maturing and it is a blessed time. In a moment my entire state of being changed. Where I was ready for days of downheartedness and embracing loss as the fundamental truth of life, Jesus rescued me. Simply because I asked, How do you want me to be looking at this Lord?

What an excellent reminder to go to the Lord with everything. Even though my son is only (!) 11 years old, I'm sure that I will be teary-eyed once he goes off to college.