Finding purpose in life

For many people, finding your purpose in life is challenging. John Eldredge, on pp. 200-201 of his book "Wild at Heart," shares a story about how God communicated to him related to his life's purpose:

Several years ago I was thumbing through the introduction of a book when I ran across a sentence that changed my life. God is intimately personal with us and he speaks in ways that are peculiar to our own quirky hearts -- not just through the Bible, but through the whole of creation. To Stasi he speaks through movies. To Craig he speaks through rock and roll (he called me the other day after listening to 'Running Through the Jungle' to say he was fired up to go study the Bible). God's word to me comes in many ways -- through sunsets and friends and films and music and wilderness and books. But he's got an especially humorous thing going with me and books. I'll be browsing through a secondhand book shop when out of a thousand volumes one will say, 'Pick me up' -- just like Augustine in his 'Confessions.' Tolle legge -- take up and read. Like a master fly fisherman God cast his fly to this cruising trout. In the introduction to the book that I rose to this day, the author (Gil Bailie) shares a piece of advice given to him some years back by a spiritual mentor:

Don't ask yourself what the world needs. Ask yourself what makes you come alive, and go do that, because what the world needs in people who have come alive.

I was struck dumb. It could have been Balaam's donkey, for all I was concerned. Suddenly my life up till that point made sense in a sickening sort of way; I realized I was living a script written for me by someone else. All my life I had been asking the world to tell me what to do with myself. This is different from seeking counsel or advice; what I wanted was freedom from responsibility and especially freedom from risk.

We cannot rely on others to tell us who we should be. We need to rely on God and his plans for us.

Preparing for your children

I recently took my son on a canoeing trip with some other dads and their sons on the Namekagon River in Wisconsin.

I have been deliberate about helping my son along his journey to manhood. One book that has been helpful in my teaching is "Boyhood and Beyond" by Bob Schultz.

According to the book, Schultz recommends that boys start to think in their teenage years about what they want their kids to be like. Schultz learned this from God when asking what to teach his daughter:

On January 11, 1978, God gave us our first child. That evening my wife went to bed early. Our daughter Molly lay beside me on the couch. I watched her like any new dad would, thoroughly amazed that she belonged to me. I knew that I was responsible for her life. She was under my care, to protect, to provide for, and to train. Never having children before, I felt somewhat overwhelmed. 'What will become of her life?' I wondered. I purposed at that moment to plan her education.

I picked up my Bible. Beginning in Proverbs, I read, looking for things to teach her. After an hour I was getting nowhere. I couldn't put my random thoughts into any sort of plan. 'God,' I asked, 'what do I teach my daughter?'

He gently answered in my heart, 'Be what you want her to be.' I didn't expect that answer. I was thinking about molding her; God was thinking about molding me. 'She will be what you are, not what you try to teach her.'

In general, children act the way that their parents act. They follow their parents' example. It's never too early to think about the example that you want to make for your children, as that will influence their children and beyond.

Conflict at a wedding reception

Weddings can be glorious and exciting. Marriage, however, can be downright difficult. On p. 195 of "Wild at Heart," John Eldredge shares how both he and his wife felt hurt and disappointment resurface while at a friend's wedding reception. Rather than succumb to Satan's attack, John prayed about his marriage:

Slowly, almost imperceptibly, the wave began to lift. My thoughts and emotions quieted down to a more normal size. Clarity was returning. The campfire was just a campfire again. Jesus, you know the pain and disappointment in my heart. What would you have me do? (The bar was no longer an option, but I was still planning to just go straight to my room for the rest of the night.) I want you to go back in there and ask your wife to dance. I knew he was right; I knew that somewhere down deep inside that's what my true heart would want to do. But the desire still seemed so far away. I lingered for five more minutes, hoping he had another option for me. He remained silent, but the assault was over and the bonfire was only embers. Once more I knew the man I wanted to be.

John went back to the wedding reception and asked his wife to dance. They had a glorious -- and exciting -- evening.

Battling demons

As we draw closer to God, we also put ourselves on the spiritual warfare battlefield. While Jesus gives us authority to cast out demons, it might not be our place in certain instances. Consider Gordon Dalbey's story from his book "No Small Snakes: A Journey Into Spiritual Warfare" of trying to counter the demons in Los Angeles:

When I dashed downstairs 20 minutes later to drive to the nursing home, to my shock I found that my car had been burglarized. My $300 guitar (that's in 1979 dollars) and recently repaired car stereo were both gone. I called the police at once, but they could offer no help by that time; in fact, when I reported my address, the dispatcher was surprised. 'We hardly ever get a theft call in that neighborhood!' he declared.

Hanging up in anger, I realized that the enemy had taken away two important weapons that I had been wielding against him: the tape deck with which I played praise songs, and my guitar with which I was even then writing more musical ammunition. How could this have happened, Lord? I cried out.

Simmering quietly, I sensed the answer: 'Don't ever again step out beyond your calling as you did last night.' For an individual to challenge the huge demonic strongholds over Los Angeles, as I had done, was at best naive and at worst suicidal. I was blessed only to have lost a guitar and tape deck for such foolhardiness. That night, I encouraged the speaker to clarify this point in order to save others from my jarring experience.

Since that time, Dalbey has been asking God if he has authority in an area before challenging demons. Dalbey has discovered that he has authority over his family and over people who give him authority by calling for counsel, asking for prayer, or attending one of his conferences.

Jesus Is everywhere

As Jesus is omnipresent, it shouldn't come as a surprise when he talks to us. He's infinitely creative, though -- which often takes us off guard. Consider this experience related by John Eldredge in his book "Beautiful Outlaw: Experiencing the Playful, Disruptive, Extravagant Personality of Jesus" (p. 184):

Another friend, Leslie, was traveling in Germany and had the privilege of seeing the renowned Oberammergau Passion Play. 'All the villagers play parts in the story,' she explained. 'For nine years they are woodcarvers and then the tenth they take on a whole new part; the men grow beards and let their hair get long.' The play is three hours in the morning, followed by a long break, and then it continues in the afternoon. She wrote this account to me:

During my break I spent quite a bit of time in one particular shop. The woodcarver himself gave me a detailed explanation of his carvings. He had a head full of long brown hair and some woman asked him if he was in the play. 'Yes,' he replied. I thought, To whom am I speaking??? Peter, James, John, Judas...Jesus?! The moment I thought his name is was as if the Lord was saying to me, You recognize me on the stage in the part you know so well, but do you recognize me in the shop? Have you so compartmentalized your life between sacred and secular, church and business, Sunday and the rest of the week that when I am out there you no longer recognize me? I realized at that moment that I could walk into church on Sunday and know what to expect because I know the story. I could see Jesus in that setting. Then I would leave and go out into my own world and leave him in first-century Palestine. I couldn't recognize him in the shop.

Expect to encounter Jesus in your life. . .not just on Sunday, and not just at church.

Pray for men

I'm always curious how authors come up with ideas for their books. I recently started reading "Healing the Masculine Soul" by Gordon Dalbey. In the introduction (pp. xxii - xxiii), Dalbey shares how he felt that God was encouraging him to minister to men:

I first realized this following a church showing of the antiabortion film 'The Silent Scream.' Deeply touched by the film, the audience of perhaps a hundred men and women moved into prayer. When the pastor invited individual prayers aloud, one person prayed for the young pregnant women; others prayed for the parents of these women, for the doctors and nurses at abortion clinics, for the unborn babies themselves, and for the nation's conscience. As I sat, head bowed, my spirit agreed with all these prayers. And yet a restless uneasiness prodded me. Something was missing, overlooked. Father, I prayed, is there something else, something maybe even more key to the issue than what's being mentioned?

Almost at once the words burst forth in my mind: Pray for the men! No one is recognizing that without a man to impregnate the woman, the abortion issue would not exist. The men are the problem, and no one even recognizes the need for My transforming hand upon them. Even if a woman agrees or even seeks sexual intercourse, she cannot force herself upon the man. It is he who has the ultimate responsibility to say No, and it is he whom I therefore hold ultimately accountable.

OK, Lord, I prayed. How shall I pray for the men?

In my heart, I sensed a clear answer. The men are not submitted to Me. They have become passive in the face of responsibility. They are not living in response to Me; they have given up the ability to respond, that is, their response-ability. Pray that the men surrender to Me, that they would receive My heart of caring for women, that the spirit of passivity would be bound in them and they would walk in responsibility.

When I spoke this prayer aloud, a unanimous murmur of approval and Amens! swept the room.

So, in Dalbey's case, God encouraged Him to pray for men. I'm thankful that Dalbey followed God's word and took it even further by writing his books.

Presence of Jesus

Jesus is omnipresent -- he is everywhere that we go. On page 183 of "Beautiful Outlaw: Experiencing the Playful, Disruptive, Extravagant Personality of Jesus," author John Eldredge shares the story of a friend who feels a little embarrassed about listening to "New Age Jazz":

At times I've felt a little odd and maybe even guilty listening to this genre. But as I was walking out to my car from a particularly difficult sales call, I was asking Him to give me peace and rest. I asked if He minded that I listened to this station. As I got in the car, I sensed Him saying, Oh no, that's fine, I'm here, too. I started the car, punched in my station, and on came an instrumental of 'Fairest Lord Jesus.' I said, laughing, 'Ah, so You are here!'

I love how creative Jesus is. We can expect Him to show up in our lives anytime, anywhere.